The monthly post - August 2020

Aug 01

So I got a job.

It's a traineeship at a local logistics business, in the 1000+ employee range. Basically they're looking for someone to show the ropes with regards to their HR systems, then having me provide ideas/recommendations for modernization/digitization. I can't quite say "Just like the simulations" but it is related to what I studied in college. So that's good.

 

Job has flaws, of course - not that I want to concentrate on them now. The only negative thing I'm thinking about is how short it all is. The contract is 9 months, and there's no saying the pandemic will be over by then. So if I haven't shown some real value to the company by end of the term I'll be out looking for a job in a pandemic again…and without the aid of government-sponsored traineeships.

 

I admit the stress is keeping me awake.

Aug 06

Preparing hard for the job, buying some new office clothes, visiting the dentist, reading up on topics related to the job. Been…not too happy, despite the good things happening in my life. The reality is I have new challenges to face and I have a bit of fear. I have to perform at my new job; I have to gradually take over the family finances; and I have to do all of this without selling soul to my career or money in general (re: my parents). I also admit I've been losing sleep lately, probably a compounding factor in all this.

 

I also continue to be astounded by how miserable the games industry is. Global competition in games is so saturated and the sheer scale of it is mind-boggling. The more I look at this crap, the more I realize that if I make games as a hobby, I will need to accept the high chance that I could offer it for free and literally nobody will play my game. At a bare minimum I could enjoy it myself.

 

Which then also begs the question why, in such a massive gaming industry, nobody has attempted the game idea that I have. It's hardly an original idea: all I'm basically doing is taking 2 bestselling games and smushing them together. If there was already an existing game that came close to my vision, I would gladly forgo my design ambitions in favor of just playing that game.